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New article- A tough one

March 15, 2009

I have just finished writing my new story for Birmingham Recycled. This one took a fair bit of reading and attempting to understand the jargon that often comes hand in hand with detailed reports on Energy.

The article was first and foremost about Great Barr’s Green Street finishing fourth whilst representing Birmingham in a national challenge to reduce their energy usage. I discovered the story on British Gas’s website and found the full report here.

The report was pretty long and detailed, but had all of the information there and available. I realised after a while that I had to treat the report like a press release, because there were some sly attempts to add a bit of positive spin on the results of the challenge.

I must admit that spin initially pulled the wool over my eyes. This is something that I must try to cut out of my writing, as I have been told a couple of times that my writing is too “fluffy” and I fail to see or comment on both sides. In other words I need to improve my critical writing.

Had it not been for Paul Bradshaw pointing this out I would have not gone back and realised that this saving of money that most streets that represented the cities reported was thanks mainly to investing in £30, 000 worth of energy saving technology.

However, hats off to the streets that took part, who have shown that with a bit of investment and encouragement from the industries and the government, we can be more energy efficient in the future.

Like I said, its a good effort. Despite finishing fourth, the street in Great Barr still maintained the second highest improvement in the country. Birmingham had the lowest rating score of energy efficiency, but across the year, showed a vast improvement, beaten only by Edinburgh’s representative.

Note to self. Be more thorough, but not waffly. Be more critical, but not pessimistic. Subtle differences.

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3 Comments leave one →
  1. March 18, 2009 19:35

    From reading your stories both on your blog and website, I think that you have made great process.

    I like the fact that you have been reviewing your own articles and making decisions to make your stories more varied. This is an important point, which I have not really picked up on myself.

    The fact you are ‘reflecting’ on your own work is showing your progress advancement in online journalism. Keep up the good work 🙂

  2. katiegraczyk permalink
    March 18, 2009 22:12

    Don’t worry Joe, you’ll get it all figured out! I liked your last sentences though, and the rest of it too! The last bit made me laugh though!

  3. jjchapman permalink*
    March 18, 2009 23:09

    Thanks guys. Glad it seems I’m on the right track!

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